The Luncheon

I'm such a dork. Not that this is news to 98% of you reading this blog. To the other 2%, I'm sorry to disappoint you. You should have read my other posts, and then you'd already know.

Today was Parent/Teacher Conference day, which is a day I generally enjoy. I like being told that my girls are wonderful, obedient, delightful, caring, smart students. It sort of makes me feel like I've done something right, which I don't usually think when I am at home with their fighting and talking back. I don't think that makes me a dork, though. Everyone likes to be told they are great. If you don't think so, then you are a dork. :)

Because it was P/T Conference, and because I am an upstanding member of the PTO, I agreed (foolishly) to be in charge of the Teacher Luncheon. I was told to plan for about thirty. I called many willing and cheerful volunteers to bring food. Then, yesterday, I found out that there would only be twenty teachers there. No problem. Too much food is better than not enough food, right? That's what I told my sister on the phone this morning.

After setting up the teacher's lounge, I ran home to make a little cheerful sign to put by the centerpiece on the luncheon table. I spent way too long on it. Not because it was fancy or long, but, because I couldn't figure out if 'You are what makes our school the best!' or 'You are what make our school the best!' was the proper way to say my measly message. It depends on how one views the word you. Is it 'you' as a whole, or each one of 'you'? I really worried for so long about it--and all for teachers who say things like 'Your homework needs done before you color your pumpkin picture.' Really. And they don't know that it is horrible grammar, because they grew up here and everyone says it.

Well, I finally went with the suggestion of my computer and said 'make', but not after way too much thought over something that was probably not even noticed in their ravenous romp through the food line. I felt like a bigger dork when my sister called and said, "Well, if you had just said 'You make our school the best!' then it would have been a non-issue." Yes, true. I'd like to blame my brain freeze on my horrible headache, but the truth is, things like this happen way too often. I'm just a dork.

Apparently, though, I'm not the only one. You see, it's a good thing that I planned for thirty people, because half of the people who were very willing to bring food, either forgot, or had terrible P/T conferences and decided against contributing. And, imagine my horror when one of the desserts someone brought was a package of dollar store fake Oreos. Yes, teachers, we appreciate you enough to give you disgusting cookies and signs with questionable grammar. I do hope that they realize that my position on the PTO is a voluntary one. Regardless, they might decide that the PTO 'needs reorganized.'